How to Choose a Wedding Photographer You Actually Connect With

1. Make Sure You Love More Than Their Instagram Feed

Instagram is a wonderful place to discover photographers and get a feel for their style, but it only shows you a tiny portion of their work.

Before booking, ask to see a full wedding gallery.

Look at how they photograph the entire day—not just those dreamy golden-hour portraits. How do they handle getting-ready spaces? Indoor ceremonies? Family portraits? Dark receptions? Details? Candid moments?

You want to know that you love the way your photographer tells a complete wedding story, not just the handful of images that make it onto social media.

2. Pay Attention to How They Make You Feel

This one matters so much.

From your first inquiry or consultation, pay attention to the experience you’re having.

Do you feel comfortable talking to them? Do they listen when you tell them what matters to you? Can you ask questions without feeling silly? Do you feel like they’re trying to understand you rather than simply booking another wedding?

There is a level of trust involved in wedding photography that I don’t think can be measured by a portfolio alone.

You are inviting someone into incredibly personal moments. You deserve to have someone there who makes you feel comfortable enough to simply be present in them.

3. Find a Photography Approach That Fits the Way You Want Your Day to Feel

Every wedding photographer works a little differently.

Some photographers are heavily focused on posing and creating each photograph. Others take a completely documentary approach and rarely step in at all.

Neither is inherently better—the question is what feels right for you.

Personally, I love a balance of both.

I’ll give you direction when you need it (because no, you absolutely do not need to know what to do with your hands 😂), but I also believe some of the most meaningful photographs happen when I give you room to simply be together.

The way he looks at you when you’re not paying attention. Your mom tearing up while helping you into your dress. Your grandparents dancing. Your best friend losing it during her speech.

Those moments can’t be recreated.

And I want there to be space for them to happen.

4. Ask Yourself: “Can I Picture This Person Being With Us All Day?”

This might sound simple, but I think it’s one of the best questions you can ask yourself.

Your photographer isn’t a wedding vendor you’ll only interact with for a few minutes.

We’re with you A LOT.

And on a wedding day, things don’t always go exactly according to plan. A timeline might shift. A button might break. Someone might be running late. The weather might have other ideas.

You want someone whose presence adds a sense of calm rather than stress—someone you trust to guide you when necessary and fade into the background when the moment calls for it.

When you’re looking through portfolios and talking with photographers, don’t only ask yourself, Do I want these photographs?

Ask:

Do I want this person there while these memories are happening?

5. Don’t Skip the Engagement Session

There’s a reason I love engagement sessions so much—and it isn’t just because you get more beautiful photographs together.

It’s our practice run.

You get to experience what it’s like being in front of my camera without the pressure of a wedding-day timeline. I get to learn how the two of you naturally interact, what makes you laugh, how you fit together, and what kind of direction feels most comfortable for you.

By the time your wedding day arrives, we’re not meeting for the first time with a camera between us.

We’ve already spent time together.

You’ve already heard me give ridiculous prompts. 😂 You know I’ll tell you exactly what to do when you need direction. And hopefully, by then, having me around feels a whole lot more like seeing someone you know than having a stranger show up to photograph one of the biggest days of your life.

6. Choose the Photographer Whose Work AND Experience Feel Right

Beautiful photographs matter.

These are the images you’ll print, frame, put into albums, show your children someday, and eventually pass down.

But I also want you to remember something:

The experience you have while those photographs are being made becomes part of the memory, too.

Years from now, you may not remember every little detail of your wedding day—but you’ll remember how it felt.

Your photographer has the privilege of stepping into that space with you, and choosing someone you trust, feel comfortable with, and genuinely connect with matters.

My hope is that when you look back at your wedding photographs, you don’t just see how beautiful your day was. You remember the joy. The nerves. The laughter. The people you love. And all the little moments God so graciously wove together.

Because your wedding photographer shouldn’t just be someone whose work you love.

They should be someone you’re genuinely glad was there.